


Isolationism and Personal Growth

by Tea_is_Not_Them



Series: Avatar Jon (AKA: Other Entities snag the Archivist) [11]
Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Archivist Sasha James, Depression, Found Family, Happy Ending, Hinted LonelyEyes, Isolation, Lonely Avatar Jonathan Sims, Personal Growth, Sort Of, The Lonely - Freeform, Tim Stoker (The Magnus Archives) Lives, but only slightly - Freeform, light fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:40:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25362526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tea_is_Not_Them/pseuds/Tea_is_Not_Them
Summary: Peter Lukas takes over the institute while Elias Bouchard is in prison. He has a personal assistant who seems to glide. Jonathan Sims is not used to feeling wanted,
Series: Avatar Jon (AKA: Other Entities snag the Archivist) [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1818751
Comments: 41
Kudos: 264





	Isolationism and Personal Growth

**Author's Note:**

> There is no joy in the Lonely sorry folks. This one is a lit different from the others in which there is season four crew and a lot of depression and Jon is a ghost of who he could have been.
> 
> My Socials if you want to cyberbully me :P
> 
> Insta: tea_is_not_them  
> tumblr: tea-is-not-them  
> tiktok: teaisnotthem

The archival staff, all five of them, knew the moment Peter Lukas took control of the institute. The walls felt less like a watcher and more like icy wind, a sea breeze. The place reeked of sadness, an invisible fog crowding the cracks between bricks and open windows. 

Melanie King had cared less, nothing would make her hate the place more than she already did. She had maxed out her anger. Sasha James, the archivist, was in her office, listening to tapes, trying to figure it all out. Tim Stoker was back in his seat, his burn scars prominent on his arms and neck, they were all just happy he made it out of the Unknowing alive. Martin Blackwood was trying not to feel the chill, more prone to loneliness than others. Alice ‘Daisy’ Tonner was laying in the cot in document storage, still trying to get herself to calm, to listen to the quiet. Basira Hussain was on her way out to meet with Elias Bouchard in prison, if only to learn anything. 

The door to the archives opened. A man only around five one or so walked down the stairs. His presence was both oppressive in its sadness and easy to overlook. He held a stack of papers, his hair in a mess of a bun. He glided like a smoke over the floor, graceful and silent. They only noticed him when the door to the archives closed, loud and deafening in the almost dead still room. 

“Hello.” He said, his glasses obscured a full look at his eyes, the lights glaring off and making him seem more like a ghost than a human. His skin was ashy, as if he was living off of nothing but work.

“Who are you?” Tim asked, picking at his lip and feeling the crackling edges. 

The man only hummed, “I’ll be the connection between the archival staff and Peter Lukas, he doesn’t care for personal visits and has other things to attend to outside of here.” He sounded both uninterested and tired. 

Martin watched slightly fascinated at how strange the whole archive felt. It was tense and cold, a quiet hush fallen and the sound of a tape recorder a room over, with the soft tone of statements. 

“He meant your name dick.” Melanie said, glaring over her phone screen. She returns to her game, not caring about the way her voice sounded like a megaphone in the echoes of dusty papers.

The man cocked his head, and then looked thoughtful, as if he had forgotten he had a name, “Ah. Sorry.” His voice was a whisper but still kept everyone's attention all the same as a yell.

“Jonathan Sims. Here are these, I can take any other forms to head office if need be.”

Sasha came out of her office and stared. Jonathan blinked at her and he glided over to her, handing her the stack instead of placing it elsewhere, “For the Archivist.”

Then he was off and back up the stairs. It was tense for a few seconds after he left. Tim stood and walked over to Sasha, his voice careful as they went to discuss in private. Martin felt confused as anything, before he went back to working, trying the shake the feeling of Alone.

\--------------

Martin was walking to the head office. He was confused as to why Peter Lukas wanted to talk to him but he had no clue why. He felt someone grab him, a small hand on his bicep pulling him into a random office. He was about to scream, but saw that it was Jonathan. His fear turned into curiosity as Jonathan seemed to be fighting himself about something, his face fighting emotions that seemed to want out. 

“Don’t listen to a thing Peter tells you.”

“What?” His eyebrows scrunched in disbelief. 

Jonathan looked aggravated, “Don’t trust Peter. Don’t listen to a single thing he says. Most of all, do not let him undermine you. He’ll do anything to isolate you so just don’t listen.” He looked around, as if paranoid. There was something so real in his voice. He felt so much like a real person, instead of a wisp of a man used as a messenger they saw in the archives once or twice.

“I don’t understand.” Martin’s head spinning. The man held Martin’s hands in his, it could have been comical with how different they looked. Jonathan looked him in the eyes. He was so cold.

“Why? Why are you telling me this?”

Jon shrunk back, the glare from the lights hid the other man’s eyes when he shifted, taking him from human back into ghostly. 

“I don’t know. I- I don’t want anyone else drawn in by him. Promise me you won’t listen to him.” Jonathan held an intensity that was never there the few times they had seen him in the archives, bringing forms and papers and taking any paperwork that was needed at top office.

Martin opened his mouth to say something before Jonathan took a breath, conducting himself, “Or don’t. I’m not your keeper.” 

He was gone. The way he walked was just grateful again and Martin left the small room. Martin shook himself and went back, walking faster to Peter Lukas’s office. For some reason, he was going to listen to Jonathan. It was strange to have a stranger care about him. He looked back at the tiny office and saw that it was Jon’s by the small sign reading his name. 

\--------

Curiosity had led Tim to the tiny office. Only curiosity. He opened the door and peeked in to see Jonathan Sims sitting at his desk, doing paperwork that was probably important. From what everyone in the institute could see, Jonathan was the one running the place. Peter was only the director in name, with his strange and distant glorified secretary doing the heavy lifting and filing. 

Sasha had wanted to meet him, making him spill his secrets so that she would have a clue as to what was going on. Instead she wanted Tim to do the research. He loved her dearly, she was his best friend, he was her anchor to humanity, but he thought it was rather rude for her to send him to depression personified. 

“Can I help you Mr. Stoker?” Jonathan sat up straight, grey eyes staring at him. Tim could have thought the man was a part of the Eye with that stare. 

“Just curious really. Why do you work for Peter Lukas?” Something casual. 

Jonathan looked confused at being addressed really. As he looked away from Tim, Tim could see the trepidation that filled him, Jonathan seemed to be one for nervous habits.

“I suppose I don’t know. It’s been a long time. I could ask you why you work for the Archives, but it’s all quite unnecessary, we're here, most against our will.” he looked off. There was a window in his office, as he watched the bustling street. Tim thought it was a rather lonely sight, being stifled alone. That didn’t deter his annoyance at being walked around word wise.

“So you’re here against your will?” Tim snarked, leaning his elbows on the desk. It smelled like old books here, in a different way than the archives. In this room it was almost nostalgia and old books than the fear and terseness in the archives. 

Jonathan looked both surprised that he said that, and surprised that Tim had caught it, “I suppose I could leave at any time. Is my presence a bother?” His voice was tinged with a sadness that must have run decades deep, sounding so small. 

“No not what I mean. I’m also here to say thank you, for warning Martin.” Martin had told them about the encounter with the newest band of spooks that inhabited the institute. Tim was glad that Martin had been warned, genuinely. Though it wasn't the real reason he had come it seemed important to say.

Jonathan hummed, “Yes well. Good to have been helpful. Mr. Lukas was a bit peevish when he found out.” He gave a small hollow laugh, there was pain behind it, before his eyes resumed looking at the papers in front of him. They must have been about the budget for each department. He pointed at the archives budget.

“Did Sasha send in the requisitions for Apocalypse stopping explosives?”

This got a strangely genuine laugh out of Jonathan, who looked confused at his own happiness, “Uh, yes I think it’s filed under ‘oddities.’” 

Tim blinked before realizing he was serious and huffed a laugh. 

Jonathan perked his head up, looking strangely blank before sighing and checking his phone, sadness passing through his features before he went back to empty stoicism, “Ah. Well you best be heading back downstairs, I have errands to run for Mr. Lukas.”

Tim stood up straight and nodded, “It was nice to meet you Jon.”

Jonathan blinked and then a small warm smile transformed his face, “It was nice to meet you too Tim.”

And he left his office holding a file folder and checking his phone. The way he walked was almost human before shifting back into inhumane gracefulness, the door closed silently.

\-------

Sasha had pulled Jonathan into her office before speaking. He was confused but let himself get dragged along, his eyes drifting from bookshelf to bookshelf. His presence seemed to get smaller every second, shrinking into himself under her gaze. He seemed to not like the way she stared. Or maybe he disliked being perceived, being looked at under her gaze that was so tainted with the watchers.

“Did you need something Ms. James?” He asked, his voice still quiet. The room was cold and Sasha felt very very alone, but she was not. She was Perceived by the thing that watched her every move, and by this ghost. 

She felt like lashing out just to stop how quiet it had become in the few seconds, “what do you want with the archives?”

Jon winced violently, Sasha felt a little bad, the compulsions sometimes hurt when someone didn’t want to talk, “nothing. I didn’t even want to come here.”

“Care to explain?”

“No.” There was a sudden moment where the room felt like something other than pure death.

“Sorry. Explain?”

Jon clenched his fists, she could see him stabbing hard with his nails and she worried that this would be the part where he hurts himself or her.

“I didn’t want to be here. Because I didn't want to know what it was like to know people are here. I didn’t want to take the chance that I was missing out on something and had to leave anyway.” Jon breathed through clenched teeth. 

“I’m sorry Jonathan.”

“I don’t care.” His voice was hollow, “Did you need anything else?”

“Would you give your statement? Of your own free will. I’ve heard it's cathartic.” She wanted to know. But there was something so fragile about this man, and she had already seen that he had no ill intention, that was enough to make her feel horrible for compelling him. She was used to making monsters angry and this felt different. Pathetic almost. 

Jon looked around, then at his phone and laughed a humorless laugh, “Sure. I have nothing else to do.”

He fidgeted with his grey sweater sleeve, and she sat down in her chair. He mimicked her and cleared his throat. His voice was soft, almost sweet.

“Statement of Jonathan Sims, regarding a Lonely childhood.”

\---------------

It started slow. Jon didn’t even realize he had been so included that he felt warm instead of that static chill. Short conversations with archive staff, turning from small talk to actual banter. Then there was the tea, he looked at the mug on his desk, Martin going up to give him some, staying back to ask him about his day, or talking about recent things happening. Lingering in the door, as if to see if Jon would say anything else. 

He found that others came in when there had been a fight, seeing his office as a place to stay away from all that was aggravating. Jon found that he rather liked being included. He also found that their fear of being alone fed him without him even doing anything, there was a part of him that hated feeding off of people, but it was squished.

Martin came in with tea, and a kind word that day. Tim had come in hours before after he and Melanie had an argument, working through his overwhelming emotions with the quiet lull of the room. Jon supposed he had that kind of effect on people, though most of the time they rather took offense to the dulling of their feelings. 

Sasha had come up with files about something, and she stayed to talk to him. He found that after the first unpleasant situation and an apology, Sasha James was a rather nice person. She was smart, and funny. She picked up on his gallows humor more than Martin did. 

Melanie had not given much thought to him other than a glare. He was thankful at being able to stay far away from her. Daisy was nice as well. Jon found that he enjoyed her silent company when she traveled upstairs, or when he came downstairs. 

Peter walked in and he gave an eyebrow to the mug of tea, “Where did you get that?”

Jon barely raised his eyes, the dead look making Peter laugh, “The Martin boy huh?”

There was no point to lie, so Jon hummed in affirmation, signing something with a stamp before setting it aside to put into an envelope. The stamp was of a seafaring boat, and he rather hated it. Peter was tacky, he thought vindictively. 

“Is that why you told him to stay away from me? So that you could isolate him. An underhanded move I’ll say but I suppose I can’t be angry-”

Jon rolled his eyes, “No. I’m not sending him to the Lonely.”

“Then what's the point my boy?”

Jon shrugged, “He seems to enjoy sitting in silence. The tea is rather nice too. I have work to do, can you leave?” just to spite the man he took a sip from the tea, the warmth cloying on his tongue. It was sweet, and he fought down the urge to make a face. He preferred bitterish tea, but he appreciated the thought.

“Are you telling me that you’re letting people into your space?”

“Peter yes I am. You are not my keeper, now. Let me run your ex-husband's institute in silence.”

Peter made a face, “I will put you in the Lonely.”

“And I can get out. Are you done?”

\------------

Jon wasn’t a well known avatar. He was rather proud of that, not wanting to be included in anything. There was a small fear that he would miss people, even evil people. 

Jon was not the best person, he had done his fair share of damage. Maybe just as much as Peter Lukas, just without the same infamy. Peter was the most well known, but Jon never had anyone escape his plans. 

He had made people forget whole people in their lives. He could erase people’s whole existence from every person in the world’s mind. Any picture with them in it was gone, or it looked natural to not have that extra space there. He could make them forcefully isolated, by taking anyone who would know them away. The crushing sadness once you realize that the one you love does not know you.

Jon didn’t want to be a bad person, but he also didn’t want to face what he had done. So he had tried to make himself as small as possible. Someone no one would remember. How disappointing his own powers didn’t work for him, because people remembered him.

Now that he knew there were people who would want to love him. People who wanted to hang around him, that thought he could be a close friend. It made him painfully aware of what he never had, what he had taken from others. It made him know that he wanted to be better. But how?

\---------

Jon was a new addition to the Archives permanent staff. He was close to Tim, Sasha, Martin, and Daisy. He was becoming a rather nice companion, and his smile was not sad nor a wisp of his past anymore.


End file.
